I recall attending one of my first Course in Miracles gatherings many years ago facilitated by my dear friend and first ACIM teacher, Patti Fields. We were all seated in Patti’s home and I listened to the other group of women assembled with me share about how they felt this core sense of unworthiness despite external success and accolades. We were a small group and I even knew some of the women outside of the group. I still recall that moment clearly in my mind. I could feel a sense of deep relaxation and inner knowing that I had finally found the path for me. The path that would lead me to ultimate liberation of the mind because I could finally talk about the stuff that I really never felt safe to do so in other spiritual circles- the shadow.
Positivity is a good stepping stone but cannot carry us all the way
Up until that point, I had been doing my best to practice positive psychology- that being happy, optimistic, and positive in my thinking were key to healing. An attitude of gratitude, and so forth. I shared this with my clients as well and I trusted that if I could just be positive enough, somehow all my problems and that of my clients would be resolved. Forever. In some distant future.
Certainly, positive thinking and seeing with gratitude and optimism feels good and are helpful steps along our journey. I felt it paved the way for me to be ready like a ripened fruit about to fall from the tree: I was completely ready and open when A Course in Miracles arrived in my life! Ready to finally take a breath and let myself off the hook for not being positive enough.
Being willing to go within
Instead, with Patti’s loving and skillful guidance, I was able to do what I later would share with my clients- becoming more and adept at doing a mind dig and realize that underneath the facade of positivity there was a boatload of guilt, shame, and unworthiness. And here were the blocks that were preventing me from experiencing a flow of love and healing with respect to relationships, financial abundance and overall health and well being. Not because I was not being positive enough but because I needed to make the unconscious mind conscious. And I needed to feel safe to do this and know that I need not do this alone. Patti was my first mighty companion and I am forever indebted to her for leading me and showing me that this was possible. She taught me that all the miracles I would ever need lay within me yet I needed to be willing to do the inner shadow work.
Letting Mary Magdalene lead the way
This week, as I sat with Mary Magdalene, whom I often refer to as Maggie, in prayer, meditation, and stillness, here is what I heard:
It is time to release shame. It is time to look at this and release this for yourself and for all the beloveds in your life. It is time to allow more space for the love and light that I want to share with you.
Are you ready? Are you willing?
I had worked on healing the feelings of guilt and unworthiness but somehow shame just had a different energy and vibration. It felt like my ego mind had gotten so used to the words of guilt and unworthiness that I needed a fresh way to go deeper. Like a new entry point- one where I could be open and allowing, and in the I don’t know mind, leaning on Maggie’s wisdom and not my own understanding.
A Course in Miracles teaches that when we ask for healing or are asked to facilitate a healing, the only obstacle with respect to healing lies in self-doubt. We place trust in our limited persona selves which is not our real Self. It is an illusion we have manufactured that feels so real. If we do put trust in this small self, then we will experience different forms of self-doubt: a fear of weakness and vulnerability, and “a fear of failure, and shame associated with a sense of inadequacy.” There can be a “guilty embarrassment stemming from false humility.” (ACIM M-7.5:4-6)
I had read these words before but this time I truly got the meaning. To allow healing to go deeper, I need to put my complete trust not in me but in the Inner Wisdom. To do this, I need to release the hold of the illusory self on my mind. This means letting go of shame, guilt, and false humility. To fully claim the inner kingdom of peace, love, and light which is our birthright.
So will you join me? Are you willing?
Each day for next five days, you will receive a message inspired by the teachings of Mary Magdalene, A Course in Miracles, and whatever feels guided and inspired to help us release our mind from shame, guilt, and unworthiness. This is my first time doing this so I truly don’t know what each day will bring. Yet my faith is steady and unwavering because I know Maggie is in charge. 🙂
Then on the final day, we will gather for a Zoom circle on Saturday May 30th at 11am EDT to 1pm EDT- where we can share, listen, and spend time in prayer, meditation, and silence together.
If you feel a spark to attend our circle, please send a payment of $25 here. Once I receive your registration payment, I will email you details of Zoom meeting on Friday. We also have some scholarships available so please email me. If you feel inspired to pay-it-forward and support another to attend who may not be able to do otherwise, please email as well.
If you feel called to join with me for one-on-one coaching, you can email me here and we can discuss what that would look like in terms of time and payment. During this week, I will offer some discounted prices as well.
My deepest gratitude to each of you for being with me and Maggie (Mary Magdalene), as she guides us deeper and deeper into healing!
Source: Mary Magdalene image
